When Every Love Ends in Heartache

Every romantic love of mine has ended in heartache. I wonder how it is that I have the strength to continue opening my heart again and again. I wonder what I’m learning about myself and about love. After most of my relationships ended or changed form, I cried a lot, and wished to keep my heart closed forever. Was it worth it to go through the pain of loss again? Was it worth it to make myself vulnerable with another person again? Maybe I would just be happier not letting my feelings get too big or too deep with anyone. Maybe it’s just not worth the risk.

I know that I’m not alone in these sentiments and wonderings. I see what friends and clients go through in navigating their own relationships. They have either (1) left a relationship that wasn’t making them happy or transforming into deeper love, (2) were mustering up the strength to leave a relationship, (3) were left by their partner and have written off relationships for a time period or completely, or (4) are in active pursuit of finding the special someone who will fulfill their dreams.

I’ve lived through each of those four scenarios. I have left relationships that were not evolving into deeper love, I have mustered up the strength to leave and wondering if it was the best choice. I have had people leave me and have decided to be done with relationships completely. I’ve been in active pursuit of finding that special someone. I’ve never gone too long being done with relationships because, well, I love love. I love the discovery process of getting to know another person. I love the sense of connectedness and companionship.

Every relationship ending somehow becomes easier as I evolve and transform. These endings are not without grief, yet they do become more manageable because my focus is on what I’m learning and how I’m transforming. It’s less about what I’m missing out on and what went wrong, and more about acceptance that this person was in my life as a love partner for a moment to teach me something important about me or about Life in general. Each person has helped my soul evolution.

I suppose that I still have a sliver of hope that someday I will recognize my soul match and we will live happily ever after. I will be grateful to the next person who sees my heart and has something to teach me, no matter how long it lasts. Through each experience, I have grown stronger and more connected to my Highest Self and to Spirit. For this, I’m grateful. If it takes another 30 years for me to learn the lessons of love, So Be It. I remember that I am Love.

Much love to you on your journey,

Helene Rose

Helene Rose guides you to your brilliance, into your heart, and into the Heart of All That Is. Join the community to practice shining from within.